This has been the most intense and stressful week I have had in a long time. One of my needs that I have been trying to articulate and get a solid plan for in my Definite Major Purpose statement (DMP) is Liberty. I achieve this liberty through investing and trading in stocks primarily. A few weeks back, I had a major insight into a company that I was researching and I knew that it would be a big winning investment. It was very encouraging, because I was seeing my intuition in action, showing me a practical way to manifest a real life situation to advance my goal.
I bought a lot of the stock (relative to my assets) and it moved up significantly very quickly. My intuition was telling me that there was still a lot more gains to be made. A couple of days ago, I let myself listen to my fear and sell the stock before earnings. Yes, I made a nice profit, but I let myself down. After the earnings came out, the stock ripped higher, gaining 30% in one day, with likely more to come. I missed out on that gain because of fear and reverting back to old ways.
Honestly, I let this devastate me for 1 day. I tossed and turned, barely sleeping at all. I called myself incompetent and worse. My stomach churned and I was making myself physically sick. It may not seem like a big deal, but the dollars were significant and I have let myself down like this numerous times in the past. So, it was really a blow to me psychologically. Having a high degree of excellence and competence with money is a critical need for me.
The next morning, I told myself that I am going to have to forgive myself for this. I can’t hold on and let it destroy me. Here is the insight that I learned. First, a lot of the reason for beating myself up about this decision was due to a scarcity mentality. I was telling myself that situations like this are so rare and I may never find a situation like that again. Well, guess what? That’s a load of crap! I realized that I could take something extremely positive from this situation. Here, I had just started working on my DMP. Its still not even finished yet. My intuition showed me a situation that would start to manifest my goal. So, the truth is, there is incredible abundance and unlimited opportunities out there. This is not about me handling one situation perfectly and manifesting my dreams in one shot. Its about me becoming a consistently positive person who sees and acts on opportunities over and over again for a lifetime.
So, I am especially proud of myself for understanding the truth of this situation, and turning it around from an extreme negative to a positive in such a short period of time! This is resilience. And its a crucial part of my other need in my DMP, True Health. I am creating a beautiful inner world and the outer world will increasingly reflect that.